Why do churches turn into country clubs?

Even though my progressive, non-fundamental Christian church is attended by a good number of new-age, non-theists mixed in with the more traditional folks, it amazes me how churchgoers lose sight of the reason why they attend church in the first place. Last time I checked, making a commitment to attend a house of worship and be a part of a religious community usually means committing to walk a spiritual path. And committing to walk a spiritual path means living, acting, and thinking in all those feel-good ways that make us better people. In a world that is filled with pain, fighting, and oppression, church should be the one place we can go, to not only feel safe, but to practice expanding our capacity for understanding and compassion.

Members of these mid-size, neighbourhood churches naturally organize lots of fun extracurricular activities…like potlucks and rummage sales and choirs and card parties.  But over time, what seems to happen is that people participate in these social events without any element of spiritual responsibility and the church becomes akin to a country club! (Perhaps I’m naïve in thinking that everyone has come to church for spiritual progression and maybe there are many who are simply there for the weekly card party.)

Whatever brought them to church, people sadly forget that first and foremost, this is the place where they are supposed to pray and meditate and constantly dig deeper to know themselves better. Instead, the church becomes a hotbed of gossip, mistrust, and backstabbing. Various dramas, factions and mini-wars break out that are microcosms of all that is wrong in the world.

I remember Bruce McLeod once making the point that prayer is really about listening for God. I can’t remember his exact words, but it seemed to me that his point was to be wary of intercessionary-style prayer intended to change the way other people are acting. The point being that it is our responsibility as so-called spiritual or religious people, to listen for the voice of reason (non-ego) within us that is our truest nature–compassion, love, understanding–and to consider how to change the way we are acting (or reacting).

We spend a lot of time and energy at my church talking about how to attract “the younger generation” to church. How to keep the church alive. We come up with lots of great ideas, new programs, hip branding. The problem is, until we get our shit together as individuals and as representatives of a spiritual community, who would want to hang out with us?

As an example of how wonderfully explicit church can be in this lesson (which never happens often enough for me in a Christian church), here is one of my favourite sung prayers:

God be in my head
And in my understanding
God be in my eyes
And in my looking
God be in my mouth
And in my speaking
God be in my heart
And in my thinking
God be at my end
And at my departing.

H. Walford Davies - click for a nice video